Can we try again? 💓

I keep telling myself that

It doesn’t have to be wrong.
It doesn’t have to be forbidden.
It doesn’t have to be looked at like taboo.
It doesn’t have to incite vulgar sneers from people.
It doesn’t have to look abnormal, or disgusting or inhuman.

Because it is beautiful.

Because the way I feel about you is beautiful

Your beauty is all there is
It’s all I need to know
True beauty is hard to find
They say it’s whit’e as snow
But even in the dark your light chooses to glow
I see beauty in your eyes
Your everything to me is gold

But is that really true?
Is that really all there is?

I ask myself
I ask myself this as I cry myself to sleep yet another night
Without you beside me
As I replay all the golden words you whispered to me
When all I knew was the love that me and you forged
Now, that love is null and void and my heart is yet again in pieces
Torn

My brokenness you’ll never know
How strong it felt yet weakened my soul
Loving felt always right
Till I realized all along I was wrong
You never loved me like you said
I wish I could trust in us
Girl all you had for me was lust

I swallow my narcissism all the way to my lonely heart
As I tell myself it’s ok to cherish and try to love you again

That this time we’ll be happy and more faithful the second time
I tell myself that we can adopt a new story overlaying our old scar.
I tell myself that this time we’ll be real
That this time my love, you’ll really feel

Was I wrong to walk away
Was it wrong I chose to go?

I tell myself to assume that insanity is not our route
And that the messages from those stained pages
Rephrasing ‘I love you’ will carve back the desire you once had for me 💔

Dare me to fix this
Dare me to pick all the pieces
Piece our puzzle with laughter and tears
To tread with you tomorrow without a single fear

Then watch me come to you
Trust this arms to touch and hold you
Watch me drown deep in this
Care and warm your ice cold skin

Bleed into me

All the things that make you who you are
And I will read all of you
Breaking my back at night to reach the ends of your spine
Feeding myself with papercuts as I take you in

I’ll touch you where others won’t
I’ll kiss you where I only should
I’ll tell you all those things that others won’t

If it takes all of me
I’ll howl at the moon and jump into the sea
To show just how much you mean to me

And it was there
In the faint darkness
As the rays of the sun started creeping in
That we held each other
With broken hearts still thumping painful heartbeats
That we promised
Our love would survive this

Because what we had was beautiful

Because what we felt for each other was beautiful

© Mukami x Grey